Have you been looking for my Postpartum Depression?

OK, so we all know that I moved to WordPress a last month, it took me months to figure out the new format, and then when I thought I figured it out, I lost it all. I guess I a few other things got lost too. Specifically my Postpartum Depression posts that is.

Last week another Heart Mom with a baby just a few months old (not her CHD kid) told me about her Postpartum Depression. We started chatting about it on Twitter and it turns out that one of my PPD posts helped her out. Things were happening in her life and she started thinking about PPD and my post. She was looking for this post —> Postpartum Depression: Mama’s Losin’ It, but she couldn’t find it on my new blog. She also told me that she had to go back to my new blog to find it. After reading my Postpartum Depression posts from my old blog, she was convinced even more that she had PPD and she needed to get help. And just like me, it took her a while, but she did it.

And that my friends, it why I blog. Not specifically for PPD, but to help others. I blogged very randomly for a good 3 years before I really got into it, and it was when Wee Nut was born with his CHD that I really started blogging. At first it was more to update my friends and family on what was going on, as well as thank them for everything they were doing. I am terrible about getting thanks out to people. Bad at returning phone calls, I can never remember to send out thanks for coming to my kids party, and giving a gift, I am even worse about remembering birthdays, and anniversaries. I have every intention of doing it, but it is one of my biggest flaws. Anyways, I started blogging mainly to keep everyone updated.

Then it got to the point where I needed to write about my emotions, my falling apart, my meltdowns, my overwhelming feeling of being lost and alone with my son’s CHD. Before I knew it, other Heart Moms and Dads were leaving comments and emailing me. They loved hearing my story and loved connecting with me, and I with them. That started the beginning of my involvement in a CHD movement to raise awareness for Congenital Heart Defects and help provide support for other families who felt like I did.

Then came the Postpartum Depression. Again, my life was changed. Except that this time, I had the power to control it, to look at it and do something about it. And to know that someday I will be cured. Completely different from my son and his CHD. He will never be cured, only repaired. But me, I know that eventually I will get better. I love Twitter and the wonderful support I have found there. I love that a Heart Mama who I connected with, was able to find help in my blog. At this point, I really doesn’t matter if someone comes across my blog and remembers if for Congenital Heart Defects or Postpartum Depression, I am so glad that I have said something that helped another person out. I blog because it makes me feel better, to connect with other Heart families, and to share my life with my long-distance friends and family. And I also blog because I hope that I can help others, that someone will ready my blog and not feel alone.

At this point I feel the need to quote myself and share one of my more humorous Labor and Delivery moments. Shortly after I was give way too much stadol (a muscle relaxer)  and about 14 hours before I actually give birth to my first born, I declared “I’ve done my part” and then passed out. Obviously, my part of the Labor and Delivery had only just begun, but at that point, I was done for and calling it a day. At this point, I do feel like I have accomplished what I have set out to do. Help others.

Getting on with my post, and my lost Postpartum Depression. When I moved to WordPress I was excited that I had a nice, easily organizable menu bar across the top of my page that I could, well organize. After working on getting everything around here looking the way I wanted it, then losing it, then rebuilding it, I had started getting a major brain meltdown and I guess I over-thought too many things. I over organized and I think the only one who can really find anything around here is me. To get to my Postpartum Depressions, you have to follow the drop down menu on The Nuts to Hazel Nut and then follow that to Postpartum Depression. Now of course to my uber organized brain, that make perfect sense, but apparently not. I now I can see why, especially with my PPD posts, if you don’t know anything about me or my PPD, you might never know it is there. I spent so much time trying to simplify my blog I lost some of my posts in the shuffle, they got put away too far back on the top shelf. So I am going to rework my menu bar and try to better organize it and remember to look at if from someone who has never been here before.

I love knowing what works and doesn’t work for my blog. I haven’t really gotten much feedback, and I am glad that Michelle over at Is is Naptime Yet was kind enough to tell me that she couldn’t find what she was looking for and that I was able to help another mother out.

COMMENT

  1. Jenny @Home is Where... | 30th Jul 10

    Bless you for sharing your heart with others, and helping other moms.

    I’ve been thinking about switching to WP, but it gives me a headache thinking about it..and I don’t think I have the time to give it if it all goes wrong and I lose stuff.

    After it was all done, did you feel it was worth it to move?

    • Hazel Nut | 30th Jul 10

      Thanks Jenny! PPD is such and up and down roller coaster, and I hope that the more I talk about it, that other mothers will see that is it more common that we are led to believe.

      Learning WP was a HUGE headache! It took me months to figure out. But now that it is done, I love it. The more I use it, the easier it gets. If you decide to go with WP, I would keep using your current blog until you are done. I had both running at the same time, but didn’t share my new URL until I was confident. While I was learning it, I changed my Theme at least a dozen times looking for the right one.

      It also took me months and months to decide to take the plunge, and I am so glad that I did!

  2. Katharine | 15th Jul 10

    P.S. My daughter is being diagnosed with ADHD. Major drama queen with wild mood swings. She was doing well till 6th grade in school so we couldn’t get it diagnosed. Now I need to return to her Dr to talk about it. We have new Drs now too (cause of insurance changes).

    • Hazel Nut | 15th Jul 10

      My ADHD son is so full of drama. Sometimes it is just so over the top I have to giggle and try to get him to see how goofy he is being. I have noticed that if I can get him to see what he is doing, he will snap out of it and get a more positive outlook.

      My son is also Failure to Thrive, and we are trying to figure out why. He has had so many tests and we can’t figure it out. It is driving me crazy working to get him to gain weight when nothing works. I am starting to think that his ADHD is related to his low weight and if we could get his weight up to at least being on the charts that it would improve his over all life and he wouldn’t be so easy to get upset. I think it would help his moods and his focus as well. There is something going on, we just can’t figure it out.

  3. Katharine | 15th Jul 10

    Hi Hazel, Cute nicknames for everyone. What precious children!! I just have one and can’t imagine having 5 all under the age of 9. I suffered postpartum depression too. It took me 2 years to ask for help and now I have fibromyalgia and depression is a big part of that. It’s great that you’ve been able to help others. I know that when I can help someone it makes me feel good.

    I hope all goes well with your son’s 3rd surgery. What a little cuttie!!

    • Hazel Nut | 15th Jul 10

      Thanks Katharine! I think that I was depressed for much longer, starting after my Heart baby was born, but I got pregnant when he was 5 months old and I think that pregnancy hormones balanced things out a bit until after my daughter was born.

      I never knew that fibromyalgia and depression were connected, but it makes sense. And when I read the statistics about ppd, I think that the numbers are way off and that there are many women who don’t understand that they have ppd and never try to seek help. I didn’t link depression with my Heart baby, I thought it was stress and I justified feeling that way, I just figured that I would out grow it over time as we adjusted. I probably should have gotten help much sooner.

  4. Michelle | 10th Jul 10

    Thanks again! I’m so glad I finally figured out what was wrong with me & now I know that I’m not just crazy! 🙂 I started taking Wellbutrin last week, and although I can’t really tell a difference yet, I’m hoping it kicks in soon.

    In about a month I’m going back to school & will be taking a full course load of junior & senior level courses in a field I haven’t studied in 4 years + I’ll have a high school student + my husband will be enrolled in 12 hours of online courses in addition to working his full time job. Oh, yeah, and there’s still the heart baby with speech therapy & special instruction sessions weekly & a (still) collicky infant. Can you say “hectic”?

    Thanks for your support & encouragement! 🙂

    • Hazel Nut | 11th Jul 10

      You are very welcome Michelle! And you let me know if you need anything, I am here for you, both for PPD and CHD.

      That is one crazy schedule! I would say I don’t know how you do it, but we are living a different version of that craziness, lol. You are going to do great! Before you know it Little Dude will outgrow his colic and your heart baby will be a little chatterbox. Of course at that point, all of that will be replaced by some other craziness, lol, but I will still be here for you 😉

  5. Andrea | 10th Jul 10

    I love you Lisa! You always bring a smile to my face and reading about your life is awesome1 Makes me feel less alone in the crazy world of living in a nut house. hahahaha Thanks for sharing your life with us!!

    • Hazel Nut | 10th Jul 10

      Haha! Well then I’ve done my part, lol. We all need to smile and feel like there is some one just as crazy as us out there 🙂

  6. Kristine McCormick | 10th Jul 10

    Just a (hug).

Leave A Comment

I would love to hear your thoughts